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IT’S JUST WILLIAM! REAL RANGERS MAN EMERGES AS FRONTRUNNER – DEAD BIG EXCLUSIVE!

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JUST WILLIAM

Real Rangers man emerges as frontrunner to be the new King of Ibrox!

‘He understands the culture of the club’

Record Sport understands that the selection process to find the new manager at The Rangers is at an advanced stage. The board of the Royal Blues believe they have the perfect candidate to lead them to glorious victory against the Papish hordes who currently sit on VI (6) league titles in a row. William, a Dutch master of strategy, ticks all the boxes, apart from his lack of knowledge of the Scottish game. His previous patronage from the Pope of Rome is also not considered a hindrance, as is not being ‘alive’, which the Ibrox faithful are adept at rationalising.

Asked if it was wise to consider someone who has been dead for 315 years, a club spokesman countered, “He’s not dead. You’ve got that wrong.” If William takes up his post, it will be the first time he has ever set foot in Scotland. Apparently paintings, banners & murals don’t count.

Exciting times lie ahead. A return to traditional values after a Papish blip that almost saw the club field a team made up entirely of Taigs.

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FIFA F*CKED IT UP!

If only the world’s governing body were as good at their job as the present board of The Rangers.

RECORD SPORT objects, in the strongest terms, to this aberration which has resulted in the Green Brigands AKA – The Bigotry Bhoys, being awarded the accolade, ‘Best Fans In The World’. We intend to get this decision tainted at the earliest opportunity and we know we can count on the support of our brothers at the Evening Times and Herald in pursuing this objective.

Watch this space.

Tickets for Saturday’s game versus Partick Thistle are available from: www.rangers.co.uk/tickets

INSIDE – how the SFA left Killie’s Kirk Broadfoot with egg on his face after the Ryan Jack appeal was upheld.

PLUS how a strong Celtic is really bad for Scottish football and the environment . Traffic jams on M74 are being caused by football fans heading North to watch Brendan Rodgers’ side despite the FACT that they haven’t won in their TWO matches.

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Disgraceful scenes as a bus load full of undesirables make their way north from Preston on the M74 on Tuesday this week!

A defeat and a draw got Pedro Caixinha the sack so is it time for Celtic to part company with an under pressure Brendan Rodgers? Our Podcast dream team discuss and tell Peter Lawwell that it is time to sack the Irishman…ps don’t but his book!

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